When will I learn to not answer the phone during the day?
it’s what the machine is for, yes?
When the phone rang I was sitting on the couch, the last song on the cd playing, the last few stitches in the latest seam of the granny squares. My timing is good, I often have to set a limit for myself so that my butt and my hands don’t get too tired.
But Phone, it could be urgent! so I toss aside the humongous aphgan, touch the Pause button on the stereo, skitter past the edge of the coffee table, hop over the corner of the treadmill and the leg of the weight bench, grab up the receiver saying Hello even before I have it settled properly over my ear.
The chirrup on the other end mispronounces my name.
Without correcting her, I settle in and get the computer to put a game of Solitaire on screen.
She is from the cancer society and seems to be all in a tizzy about how our fair state is going to increase taxes on a pack of cigarettes, saying that in two years, the things will cost $2 more than they do today.
A higher price of cigarettes will often deter someone from ever starting to smoke.
Do I support a tax increase on cigarettes?
just as I find the last King and drag it to the empty space
I like to play dumb hillbilly now and then, which often gets my husband and sons climbing the walls, but I did live in hill country the first 22 years of my life before college, so I can drop back into the mindset.
With a light touch of disinterest coming through my voice, I told her I don’t care how much they tax cigarettes.
I don’t smoke ‘em.
There was a bit of sputtering on the other end, but she managed to come up with secondhand smoke effects everyone in the vicinity.
She couldn’t see me shrug, but I told her that we all gotta die of something, that she is wasting her time, I am not interested giving anybody else any money when I have the co-payment for a root canal coming up next week.
Before giving her a chance to say anything else, I took the receiver away from my face, said “Have a good day” and hung up.
And now I’m having second thoughts about being so rude because I figure she’s a gal actually trying to earn her way in the world and I’m a part-time Sunday School teacher who should act like a pillar of the community.
Next time, I’ll let the machine answer.
~~love and Huggs, Diane
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